How To Build Resilience: One Question To Push You A Little Forward

Imagine asking me how to build resilience, and I answer with, uhmm, there is this scene from a series I was watching.

Well, that’s exactly what I am going to do.

I’m sorry, but if you stick with me for a few seconds, it will make a lot of sense.

If you are on the verge of giving up, this could give you a little nudge. Nothing more than a gentle shove on the back, I promise. I don’t want to push too hard and injure you.

The 100, Season 2, Episode 7

In the series, The 100, some guys have been captured inside a 100-year-old bunker. People on the outside are trying to save them. One of the main characters, Clark Griffin, discovered the main occupants of the bunker had been killing her friends. She was devasted. So, she lost all hope. She walked into a workshop to tell her other, Raven, what had happened.

The conversation was like this:

Clark: (Walks in) We’re too late. They are already bleeding them. It’s over.

Raven: (Turns around in surprise. Then stands up). No, you don’t get to give up, Clark. You killed Finn, and I didn’t give up. I am building a damn tone generator, do your job.

Clark: What’s my job?

Raven: I don’t know, to come up with something.

The three below lines are the things you should start saying to yourself.

Do your job?

What’s my job?

To come up with something.

It’s okay to feel frustrated. It’s okay to want to quit. But remember, you have only one life, and you have choices.

To play, as Cheryl Strayed said, the best out of the cards you are given.

It’s okay to hate everything. It’s okay to say why me. It’s okay to ask why this isn’t working. To feel like the world is against you. To assume that there is a force trying its best to make your desire look impossible.

But, do your job.

That’s all you have. That’s the thing in your care.

But what’s my job? You ask me.

I don’t know… To come up with something.

That’s how to build resilience.

No, I am not saying that figuring things out has to happen here, right now.

Rest. Take a walk. Read some of my best articles or read some of the lessons from people who have done great things.

After taking a break, say an hour or a week later, it’s time to sit up.

Do your job.

And what’s your job?

To come up with something.

Yeah, you may have to pick a pen and paper and write 10 possible solutions to that problem.

It’s a great start. But you won’t work on all of them at once. You can’t.

Start with one.

It doesn’t have to be perfect. Sometimes, you will figure things out by starting something else.

When I was in secondary school, my teachers wanted me to study medicine. I went to a higher institution to become an architect. I am currently learning how to code and doing SEO. Someday, I could return to holding a mouse, designing floor plans, and landscaping acres of land. You never can tell.

I will figure it out. But here I am.

So, do your job.

I am doing mine.

What is our job?

To come up with something.

The good thing about all of this is the point where Raven said, “I don’t know.”

You can ask for help. You can read a book, watch a video for insights or talk to a mentor. It’s your responsibility to figure things out.

When you get to where you want to go, you will say, “I did it.” Why?

Because it’s up to you. You always want to take the hero’s sit.

So, here’s the part where I tell you how to build resilience. And it’s somehow intolerable, silly, and annoying to hear. It looks lame.

Do your job.

Come up with something.

Figuring things out is work.

Is that it? Like seriously.

Yes, I am sorry — if you want something more, but that’s it for now.

I hope you figure something out as soon as possible. But, remember, your job is to start on that journey to find a solution, wherever you are, whatever you lay your hands on.

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